What makes a martial artist?

Learning techniques does not make one a martial artist. Hmmm, that's a bold statement isn't it? But, it is true. I learned that lesson last night the hard way. I had one of the hardest classes I've ever had and left class distraught and frustrated. Let me explain what happened.

We were doing a class on self defense; real life scenarios. What do you do in a confrontation and at what point do you actually engage an attacker to defend yourself? Learning martial arts you have a responsibility to your attacker because of the knowledge that you have. Your job is to gain control of the situation and maintain control. Control could be walking away, diffusing the situation with words, or in worse case, gaining control using physical techniques to submission.

I was feeling uncomfortable, but thought to myself, "I can do this". I had been feeling pretty good about my training in the past 2 years, however God certainly has a way of humbling you.

Initially, each student squared off with another to practice the worse case scenarios. I was concerned about keeping control of my punches, kicks, etc and not hurting a fellow student. I was afraid emotion would take over and I would not pull back enough or if I kicked in the wrong place someone could be hurt. One kick to a knee can do tremendous damage. In the first situation, I simply walked away. That was easy to do since I was faced off with my son. The next couple of times I worked with the younger kids. Let me tell you, they kick pretty hard.

When faced with an adult male who tried to grab me my first thought was a wrist lock but his hands were so large I didn't get it and I just stopped. My mind went blank and I didn't know what to do. You would think that with all of the techniques that I had learned, something would take over automatically, it didn't. The tension in the room by this time was in a very heightened state and there was a lot of yelling and chaos. This is by design by our Master Instructor.

My last set ending up me being with two of our adult male students pretending they were going to take me with them. We had just finished discussing pressure points and my mind was focused on trying to get one of them with a pressure point and force the other to back off but I couldn't get my hands on either one. I was so focused on that one technique all I could do was move around and try to stay out of their grasp. One of them slipped behind me and put his arm around my neck in a tight choke hold cutting off some of my air. My mind panicked and went to the recces of a similar dark time in my childhood. I was no longer with other students but in the past and fear took over. I didn't have the wherewith all to say stop and all of my training went out the door. When Soke saw that I didn't know what to do, he paused us and told me to focus on one of the attackers and not both. He instructed me to do a hip throw on the one holding me. I heard him as if I was in a tunnel and tried to process what he was saying. I tried the hip throw which I've done many times. I couldn't even do it correctly. My brain had shut down at this point and pure panic and fear was there instead. I was able to get out of his grasp and thankfully at that moment class ended. I had to leave the room as emotion overtook me. You may have heard of females that have been abducted that knew martial arts and wondered why didn't they defend themselves? I know understood why with complete clarity.

Remember my opening statement, knowing the techniques doesn't make you a martial artist, applying what you have learned does. Martial arts is not only a physical art but a mental art as well. Can you keep control of yourself in order to control the situation? As a female, can you keep your confidence and your wits about you to control the situation? And for me, as a child from an abusive background can you control the panic and fear?

It was a tough lesson. This morning I can sit and think, "Why didn't I do this or that?". I am frustrated that I didn't perform any of the things that I have learned over the past two years. In our intermediate classes Sensi often tells us, "You have learned the technique, now it's time to do it with speed and fluidity."

Last night showed me that I have such a long way to go and I'm far from being what I consider for me, "a true martial artist".



Love and Merry Christmas,
Lisa

ps. (Scott, we need to finish our demolition downstairs and get the gym back together, I have some training to do!)